feelin' down
Sept 13
Funny how small things awaken nostalgia. last night i cried myself to sleep - i feel kind of glad about it cause it's been so long i wasn't sure i ever would again, and knowing you can cry is a sign that at least the most basic emotional functions are still working. I aim to laugh myself to sleep someday soon, probably be the catalyst to complete madness (watch this space).
Thing is that absence does make the heart grow fonder. When your apart from someone, last night i felt it in every bone, sinew and through all the mucky stuff -i ached, and whilst it confirmed a lot of things that made me glad, in turn her not being there to share it made me sad- feels like i'm missing a heartbeat.
At least when i woke the cook was soon on hand to brighten my morning. After convincing him that i only wanted corn flakes (not omelette; fried egg; indian vegetables; bread just corn flakes), I explained away his blank look with the corn flakes; milk and a bowl explanation. When he returned 10 minutes later with a corn flake broth consisting of hot milk, CF and sugar i didn't know where to look. I almost ate it, but figured i didn't want to be eating this every day for the next 3 months so talked him through it (bowl - corn flakes - little milk - serve). Bless him, i shall endeavour to learn a few words of mandalayalam so that we can at least try and laugh about it.
Funny how small things awaken nostalgia. last night i cried myself to sleep - i feel kind of glad about it cause it's been so long i wasn't sure i ever would again, and knowing you can cry is a sign that at least the most basic emotional functions are still working. I aim to laugh myself to sleep someday soon, probably be the catalyst to complete madness (watch this space).
Thing is that absence does make the heart grow fonder. When your apart from someone, last night i felt it in every bone, sinew and through all the mucky stuff -i ached, and whilst it confirmed a lot of things that made me glad, in turn her not being there to share it made me sad- feels like i'm missing a heartbeat.
At least when i woke the cook was soon on hand to brighten my morning. After convincing him that i only wanted corn flakes (not omelette; fried egg; indian vegetables; bread just corn flakes), I explained away his blank look with the corn flakes; milk and a bowl explanation. When he returned 10 minutes later with a corn flake broth consisting of hot milk, CF and sugar i didn't know where to look. I almost ate it, but figured i didn't want to be eating this every day for the next 3 months so talked him through it (bowl - corn flakes - little milk - serve). Bless him, i shall endeavour to learn a few words of mandalayalam so that we can at least try and laugh about it.
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